Another Unhappy Birthday

I should expect it, but I must be stupid.  He's done it every year we've been together, except for my 40th and 50th and that was because other people were there.  He asks me what I want, I tell him, then he leaves it till the day before to get me something and it's always not what I asked for.  But that's okay I don't care about stuff.  It's the rest of it that hurts me.  I always make a fuss of everyone's birthday, whether we have money or not, it isn't hard to print out a sign, put up a few balloons and make a cake.  I've always been the one to plan our anniversary dinner and cook it etc.  They know what I like, what means something to me and it's not much.
This year he outdid himself.  I told him I really wanted a gold locket to put Sarah's photo and some of her hair in.  He could have got one at a good price on the many trips he's done to Wagga lately.  I also needed a new watch and wanted a speaker system for my iPhone.  I bought that with some money I won last week.  So yesterday, when we're already short of money he goes down to the local jeweller and buys both the locket and the watch with money we just didn't have.  They are both lovely, but he also made a crack that we'd be lucky to afford food for the rest of the fortnight (not true).  Then Josh went to school, Emily scurried back to her filthy den and he sat on the lounge and stared at his computer.  No plans for the day, no offers of a cup of tea.  I got dressed and drove up to Young and spent some money I had put away for this very day.  I got a sandwich and had it at a rest stop on the way home.  When I got home he was angry with ME.  I spent the rest of the afternoon crying in my room where I will stay until this miserable day is over. 
But I vow that this will be the last year I spend my birthday alone and crying.  I have never, ever in my life spent a birthday alone.  And I never will again.