Perfect Spring Day.....and then........

It's a beautiful Spring day today, perfect.  I talked Phill into driving down to Albury to see his sister and his parents.  So he took the kids to school and off he went.  I got the house cleaned, the washing hung out, pottered about enjoying the peace and solitude.  I only have till Friday and then I have ALL of them home for TWO WEEKS.  Even so both kids will have a half day Wednesday and Thursday will be a write off due to the mediation and group etc.

So I put some music on and sat down at the computer with a cup of coffee (see who's on the mug? We bought it for Phill but he didn't want it for some reason).

And then, and it wasn't even 1pm, it happened.  Yep the school rang.  I didn't answer, and they left a message but didn't say which kid or why.  Later they rang again.  Emily is in sick bay with stomach pains.  Funny she was hale and hearty all weekend eating up a storm and having a great old time.  I didn't talk to them that time either.  She can stay there.  I have no car to go and get her even if I was inclined to do so and I'm not.  And this morning while picking my way through the quagmire that is her bedroom I found some writing, about me of course, it's always about me, and it was hurtful and untrue and I'm so sick of being the brunt of all her angst and the reason for all her problems. 

I have not had an alcoholic drink since July 26th.  I am feeling calm, thinking rationally, and doing all the right things.  I have made huge changes in myself and my life, with no encouragement and no support.  I am living with the Three Little Pigs while I continue to work on myself and also make life better for all of us.  I had a crap night sleep thanks to the snoring that even the ear plugs didn't block out and the fact that my husband is growing fatter by the day and taking up more and more room in our bed.  He is techinically morbidly obese and had the hide to tell me that it was because he is drinking less that he is gaining weight as he wants to eat more.  He has always eaten more.  And more.

Anyhoo that was my rant.  They can all go jump in the lake or whatever people do nowadays when someone wants them to fuck off.

The Juvenile Justice junket turned up yesterday and explained the procedure for the farce that will take place on Thursday it looks like.  I don't even want to go.  If Emily doesn't go and pretend she is sorry they can take her back to court.  At this point I don't care.  Thursday is also the 17th anniversary of Sarah's death but nobody will remember or mark it but me.  If I had my way I'd jump in the car and drive up to Sydney and spend time at her grave. 

Phill made a flying visit to see his sister and must have had a lightning fast d&m with his mother and is on his way home.  At least he went.  At least I had four hours of peace.  I'll take it when I can get it.